User:Yeltensic42/Benskonia

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The flag of Benskonia.

Emperor of Benskonia, standing eight blocks outside of his realm on June 19, 2005

The Amalgamated Territories of Benskonia (generally shortened to Benskonia) is a constitutional monarchy in North America; its heads of state are His Majesty Emperor Christopher the Great and Her Majesty Empress Ashley the Great; its heads of government are President Christopher Michael Bensko and Prime Minister Ashley "Christina's (Least) favorite student" Brooke Thompson. The nation is comprised of four enclaves entirely surrounded by The United States of America: Alberta-Herculaneum (named for Senator Albert Kellermann and Senator-in-Exile Hercules Q. Public) within a bedroom in DeLand, Florida; Calvinia-Hobbesia (named for the late Senator Thomas Hobbes and the late Calvin Bensko) within a bedroom approximately 30 miles away in Eustis, Florida; Thompsonica, 10 miles from AH, surrounded by Deltona, Florida; and Sachaland (named for Duchess Sacha Cartagena), near Thompsonica. There is also the Toilet Territories, consisting of the adjacent bathrooms. Benskonia has a total human population of 1 as of the 2005 census. The capitals are West Dormira City (pop. 1) and East Dormira City (pop.1); the single resident of both cities is the same, the aforesaid Chris Bensko.

Believe it or not, it actually qualifies as a legitimate country under the Montevideo Convention of 1933. However, its sovereignty is not recognized by any other country other than Tirben, nor by the United Nations.

1 History
2 Geography
3 Government and Politics
4 Constitution
5 Culture
6 Miscellaneous

[edit] History

Benskonia was established on August 18, 2005 with the signing of the ATB constitution by its framer, Chris Bensko, with the "advice and consent" of Senator Albert Kellermann and (later exiled, now exercising political duties from abroad) Senator Hercules Q. Public (they were unable to sign the document, being illiterate). The signing actually took place on a table in the kitchen, approximately 10-15 feet outside the border of the young nation. [Note: The next sentence was not added by Yeltensic]..Obviously, the good citizens of Benskonia owe an everlasting debt to the cultural leadership demonstrated by the nomads of Hallmania who, during a brief visit late in 2003, taught the Benskonians many invaluable life-lessons including, but not limited to: the art of creative Seinfeld viewing; getting to the mailbox first; leaping six feet in the air at the first sight of a cockroach; and rapid exits.

On May 26, 2006 the aforementioned Ashley Thompson and Sacha Cartagena became empress/prime minister and duchess, respectively, in addition to Thompsonica and Sachaland being added to Benskonia.

[edit] Geography

The principal geographical features of Alberta-Herculaneum are a bed on the wall opposite the door, with a window above it; a cabinet, a dresser and a bookcase along the western wall; a bookcase and a shelf of DVDs on the northern wall next to the door; a bookcase, a shelf with a TV, a VCR and Nintendo, a table with a computer on it, and a small cabinet on the eastern wall, with a poster for the Sands Theater (DeLand) performance of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory above them; and a papa san near the center.

The principal geographical features of Calvinia-Hobbesia are four annoying windows opposite the door; a TV cabinet and a bookshelf on the wall to the right; a dresser along the wall extending away from the door; a bed and nightstand opposite the TV cabinet; a bookshelf, two boxes and a computer desk in front of the windows, doing a little to keep out the evil sunlight; and a Yellow Submarine poster and an Aqua Teen Hunger Force poster above the aforesaid bed.

[edit] Government and Politics

Note: Due to the recent death of Thomas Descartes Hobbes, these positions are still being reapportioned.

Benskonia is a constitutional monarchy, with His Majesty Emperor Christopher as head of state. The government is divided into three branches, operating under the checks and balances system. The executive branch is headed by President Christopher Bensko, with a cabinet consisting of Secretary of State Albert Kellermann, Attorney General Hercules Q. Public, Secretary of Defense Thomas Hobbes, Secretary of the Treasury Hercules Q. Public, Secretary of the Interior Albert Kellermann, Secretary of Education Thomas Hobbes, Secretary of Transportation Albert Kellermann, Secretary of Health and Human Services Hercules Q. Public, Secretary of Homeland Security Thomas Hobbes, and Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Hercules Q. Public. The legislative branch, Parliament, is divided into the Senate, consisting of Senator Thomas Hobbes (representing Calvinia-Hobbesia) and Senator Albert Kellermann (representing Alberta-Herculaneum; and the House of Commons, consisting of MP Chris Bensko, MP Albert Kellermann, MP Thomas Hobbes and MP Hercules Q. Public. The judicial branch, the Supreme High Court, consists of Chief Justice Chris Bensko, Justice Albert Kellermann, Justice Thomas Hobbes and Justice Hercules Q. Public.

The major political issues lately are the death of Thomas Hobbes, and how to work around that; the mildly contoversial exile of Hercules Q. Public; diplomatic relations with the surrounding households; and achieving recognition from the U.N. and the U.S. government, which are so far unaware of Benskonia's existence. Its political parties are the CHRIStian Democratic Party (liberal), the Albertan Liberal Party (liberal), the Herculean Socialist Party (liberal), the Hobbesian Labor Party (liberal), and the Left Calvinist Party (liberal).

[edit] Constitution

Preamble: We, the people, in order to form a (more/less/equally/none of the above) perfect union, to promote the general wel...um, let us merely say that we hereby form a new nation, the Amalgamated Territories of Benskonia, Incorporating the Enclaves of Alberta-Herculaneum and Calvinia-Hobbesia, within the bedrooms (in the City of DeLand and the City of Eustis, respectively, in Volusia County and Lake County, respectively, in the State of Florida) of His Majesty Emperor Christopher the Great.

Article I: The nation of Benskonia is a constitutional monarchy, with His Majesty Emperor Christopher the Great as its head of state. He shall exercise only ceremonial duties, such as opening and dissolving Parliament, and presiding over the presidential inaugural ceremony.

Article II: The government of Benskonia shall be divided into three branches, operating under a system of checks and balances.

A. The executive branch shall be headed by the President, elected by the the people (including cats and gerbils in this sense). As cats and gerbils are inherently illiterate, any humans in the population shall cast votes on their behalf. The President shall sign or veto laws made by Parliament, appoint members of the Cabinet, appoint justices to the Supreme High Court, and appoint ambassadors. The President will be commander-in-chief of the armed forces, if ever created.

B. The legislative branch shall be headed by Parliament, made up of the Senate (one senator for each enclave) and the House of Commons (two MPs for each enclave, but necessarily representing a specific enclave). Parliament shall make laws, which must pass in each chamber before being sent to the President to be signed or vetoed; a two-thirds vote can override the veto. Parliament shall confirm or deny any presidential appointments.

C.The judicial branch shall be headed by the Supreme High Court, comprised of four justices, one being the Chief Justice, appointed by the President. The justices shall interpret and apply the law, and have the power to declare laws unconstitutional.

The Bill of Rights:

I. Freedom of Speech

II. Freedom of the Press

III. Freedom of Religion (however, the official state-endorsed religion shall be CHRIStianity, a national subset of the Invisible Pink Unicorn, otherwise known as atheism)

IV. Freedom of Pastimes (a euphemism for "time-waster")

V. Freedom to Procrastinate (why do it now when you can do it later or never?)