Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Peer review/Joint Security Area

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[edit] Joint Security Area

I think the article now has a good start, with appropriate separation of data into proper categories. However, I know there is a lot more information out there that hopefully others can find or share. wbfergus 19:04, 1 December 2006 (UTC)

  • I think I've taken care of most of the points above. Thanks for the feedback guys! There are a couple more areas that need a bit more work though:
The section on buildings needs a lot more work.
Still need to improve the picture flow.

Any other ideas/suggestions?

wbfergus 15:29, 3 December 2006 (UTC)

[edit] Visviva

Impressive work! Couple o' thoughts:

  • A lead section should summarize the article in such a way that it could stand on its own (see WP:LEAD). As written, the lead section could stand on its own quite well, but it doesn't really summarize the article; the main body of the article currently expounds in great detail on the various operations and incidents in the JSA, but these are scarcely mentioned in the lead. This might best be addressed by adding sections to the body of the article which would expand on the topics raised in the lead (such the JSA's legal and diplomatic status).
  • There are some NPOV concerns... in particular, the assertion that all incidents in the JSA have been due to KPA provocations really needs an authoritative source. More generally, at present (thanks to your wonderful efforts) this article describes American actions in the JSA in great detail; more information about the North Korean side of things is needed. Although, of course, that information won't be easy to come by...  :-)
  • A couple of small things:
    • the relationship between the JSA and Panmunjeom is not clear. I had always been under the impression that the JSA was in/near Panmunjeom, not identical with it. A detailed map would perhaps help to clarify this, if one can be found.
    • People like me who have seen JSA (film) are going to want to know if there are really Swiss and Swedish soldiers there. And if not, were there some in the past? What about Chinese or Soviet soldiers?

Thanks for getting this article off to a great start! -- Visviva 02:19, 2 December 2006 (UTC)

[edit] Kirill Lokshin

A good start. Some general comments:

  • The lead section should be a summary of the article, not material in its own right. The description should be moved into the body of the article.
  • The division into "Major events" and "Incidents" seems artificial and unnecessary, guided more by the availability of operational codenames for one set. I'd combine the two into a single narrative flow, from start to end, broken up into a few sub-sections by period or theme.
  • Operational codenames should not be rendered in all caps. That quirk of military typography is deprecated on Wikipedia.
  • Section headings ought to be kept short; the dates are almost certainly not needed in them.
  • The gallery should be broken apart, with the images—with appropriate captions!—spaced throughout the article.
  • Thorough citation is necessary for all the material here.
  • The "See also" section should be trimmed by providing the links in appropriate places in the text.
  • A map of the JSA would be really nice to have here.

Kirill Lokshin 01:14, 3 December 2006 (UTC)

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