Topping from the bottom

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Topping from the bottom is a BDSM term, meaning a person who wants to be dominated but simultaneously direct the top to do it according to their wishes. Contrast with 'service top', one who agrees to deliver a given experience for a bottom.

Some people see all BDSM experience in the hands of a competent Dom/me as teaching limits and self-discipline, and therefore argue that setting hard limits is itself a subtle form of topping from the bottom, arguing there should be total trust and no preset assumptions. They would instead tend to view the concept of hard limits as another example of attempts by the sub to retain control and dictate to the dom/me what dominance is or is not okay, rather than experiencing genuine surrender and allowing trust to direct the scene. This is a minority view which although generally acknowledged, is not shared by most practitioners.

Topping from the bottom is usually considered poor practice amongst lifestyle BDSM devotees, although fairly common amongst the "BDSM curious" or newcomers who have had submissive sexual fantasies for some time but lacked real experience of a sexual dominant.


[edit] See also