User:Seguinism

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Seguinism is a religion built around the Almighty Master Seguin. He is the only true master of the English language and can destroy all the other teachers in a witty-remark contest. He is sometimes called Master Gandalf for his wisdom and age. Legend has it that he was born 80,000 years ago and came out of a volcano for the sole purpose of teaching the English language correctly. He is currently teaching English in an unknown T1 classified location, rumored to be in Napals. He is also an avid listener of rock music and has many favorite bands, such as: The Cure, Rise Against the Machine, Tool, David Bowie, The Beatles, The Dave Matthews Band, Nirvana, Led Zeppelin, and Queen. He is also a huge fan of Lance Armstrong for reasons yet to be released by the administration. He is known by his students for his impossible tests and quizzes. He creates these hideous tests in his factories in Seguin, Texas and Seguin, Ontario. These tests, worth approximately one billion points, are based on boring literature. Conspiracy theorists have concluded the boring literature to be a training method to help improve the students skill in reading for the future. This reading comprehension (as told in legal terms) is from the depth of Hades itself and the quizzes and assessments that he brings on the students cause the utmost pain for them. With it's major workload that tends to bring kids to their knees, people are silently watching as they watch their friends and family fall into the tyranny of Seguinism. Some people, however, believe that this is the right way to go with things and whole-heartedly support this cruel method. Although the originator of Seguinism has been itentified as "cool," kids that suffer at Oxford Academy can only watch helplessly as their peers fall into the English pain of Seguinism. People in the witness protection program have taken the picture above, but unfortunately his face cannot be shown in case of legal and moral action.

[edit] How He Teaches Others

Only a chosen few people are chosen to become one of the chosen ones to be taught by the almighty Master Seguin. He teaches with an extremely rigorous and strict lesson plans, which only a few of the scholars chosen to become his own to be taught have passed. If his students are misbehaving, he tells them to STFU!

[edit] Students

The students of Master Seguin must pass a variety of tests just to be in the presence of Master Seguin. Very few students of Master Seguin have actually gotten a positive report from the Master himself. These are you okay little monster man?kids have only their luck to depend on as his technique is unpredictable and cause major problems for the poor students that are stuck with him for their seventh grade year. Those who have, are taken by the U.N. for inspection and are never seen again.

[edit] Almighty Master Seguin Teaching Style