Pittsburgh (Weeds episode)

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Weeds episode
"Pittsburgh"
Episode no.	22
Prod. code	212
Orig. airdate	October 30, 2006 (Showtime)
Writer(s)	Jenji Kohan
Director	Craig Zisk
Guest star(s)	See Below
Theme song performer	Malvina Reynolds
Season 2 2006-08-14 – 2006-10-30
Corn Snake Cooking With Jesus Last Tango in Agrestic A.K.A. The Plant Mrs. Botwin's Neighborhood Crush Girl Love Panic Must Find Toes MILF Money Bash Mile Deep and a Foot Wide Yeah, Like Tomatoes Pittsburgh
List of all Weeds episodes...

"Pittsburgh" is the 22nd episode of the Showtime series Weeds. It is the 12th episode of the second season and the second season finale and aired on October 30, 2006.

[edit] Plot

The Season 2 finale starts with Shane practicing his commencement speech in the mirror. All seems well in the Botwin household except for the disappearance of Silas. Nancy busily packs "Drug Free Zone" signs and cameras into garbage bags. Lupita calmly brings Nancy a cup of coffee. Nancy asks Lupita if she knew about Silas stealing the signs and cameras. Lupita reponds with the assertion that Silas had stolen all the Anti-drug paraphernalia for Nancy. She then exclaims that it is better to steal the cameras than to steal car stereos or doorknobs. Nancy finds it ridiculous that somebody would steal a doorknob. Lupita responds "There are some nice door knobs." Nancy then instructs Lupita to be sure that Silas and Shane goto her sister Jill, not to Andy in the event of something happening to Nancy. Lupita assures Nancy that she will do her best.

Andy is in his bedroom with Kat. He is arguing with her about whether or not he will be moving to South America with her. Andy asks why they have to leave. Kat begins to give Andy a hand job while she explains her theft of $1.3 Million in poker chips from a casino in Canada. She also explains that the Eskimo man following her is after her as a bounty hunter, and also an ultimate fighter. She then unveils her plan: sell the chips to a guy named "Homie" who is a big gambler in South America. She expects Homie to pay $0.34 per dollar value of chips. Andy brings up fond memories of the time she stabbed him for stepping on one of her "spirit animals," and explains that when he left her, he never intended she find him again.

Meanwhile, at the motel room, Celia sits at the foot of the bed smoking cigarettes and drinking liquor as she views the surveillance videos recorded from her anti-drug cameras. She is drunk. Suddenly, she sees a human hand display the middle finger on the TV screen. She clumsily drinks down her sip of alcohol before seeing Silas' face. She leans forward and rewinds the tape. When she replays the tape, she recognizes Silas, and exclaims "Son of a bitch." The video continues to show Silas disabling the camera. Celia ejects the video tape, and exclaims "Son of a fucking cold bitch!"

At the Botwin house, Nancy attempts to contact Silas. She issues an ultimatum: Amnisty in exchange for his return to the house within an hour, probation if he returns for Shane's graduation, and at the very least, she pleads he let her know he is alright. Shane walks in, dressed in his graduation suit. Shane asks Nancy if they are moving. Nancy dodges the question. Shane then asks if Silas will attend his graduation. Nancy confesses that she is unsure. Shane then asks Nancy what to tell people when they ask what his mother's profession is. Nancy answers that he is to tell them she is his mom. Shane then explains that he has done research on the internet, and concluded that Pittsburgh is the best place for the family to move to. Nancy takes note, but is bewildered.

At the Hodes house, Dean happily watches Saturday morning cartoon with Isabelle. They are both eating cereal when Isabelle announces that she has spilled her cereal on the sofa, and must get paper towels to clean the mess. Dean advises Isabelle to relax, and explains that Celia is gone, and can't punish Isabelle for spilling her cereal milk on the couch. Isabelle cites the Harry Potter books they read together in wake of an antidote: Celia is like the character Voldemort, Dean may have reduced her to vapor for now, but "she is out there, gathering her strength, and she will be back." Dean looks horrified, but cheerfully advises Isabelle to get ready for her big graduation day. Once Isabelle has left the room, Dean swiftly begins to clean the sofa with a rag.

Nancy calls Silas before she leaves to Shane's graduation to inform him that she expects him to attend Shane's graduation. Once she hangs up, Celia appears. Celia is obviously drunk, and demands to see Silas. Celia then explains that Silas stole civic property. Nancy explains that she knows nothing of it. Celia exhibits a video tape that she claims proves Silas is the anti-drug sign and camera thief. Nancy snatches the vise from Celia and smashes it with her feet. Celia retaliates by reaching into her purse and pulling out a handgun. Shane walks into the room just in time to be duck behind the kitchen counter with Nancy. Nancy asks Celia where she got a gun. Celia explains that the gun was loaned to her by Pam. Celia then lets off a single shot into the kitchen wall, and expresses her surprise and excitement before recomposing herself. Celia then drops the gun and explains that she only had one bullet she intended to use on Doug. She then calmly leaves. Nancy grabs the gun and empties the lone spent gun shell. Shane then exclaims that the entire event would never have taken place in Pittsburgh.

Conrad is at Heylia's house as is Vaneeta. Heylia teases Conrad by offering him a last meal before Peter or U-turn kill him. Conrad sits uneasy, and asks Heylia what she knows. Vaneeta explains that Nancy came to them, and that they know Conrad's predicament. Conrad states that he told Nancy not to goto Heylia. Hylia then explains her thoughts on what Peter has in store to Conrad. Heylia then reiterates that she feels Conrad will be killed by Peter if the deal goes through.

At Shane's graduation, he presents his commencement speech. It is a disaster; although Shane's speech is relevant, the subject matter is not appropriate, and the speech is ended by Principle Dodge on the pretense of profanity after a quote from Snakes on a Plane, much to the dismay of the other children. The graduates begin to chant "Let him speak." over and over as Principle dodge attempts to proceed with the ceremony. Nancy appears cheerful until she sees Peter standing away from the crowd. Peter leaves after Nancy recognizes him. Nancy explains to Andy that she must leave for business, and asks him to take Shane to the graduation party. Principle dodge then declares "Congratulations, you all have graduated. Goodbye." and the graduating class goes wild with celebration. Shane is dismayed that Nancy leaves. When Nancy reaches her car, she finds a note beneath her driver side windshield wiper. The note reads: "JUST MAKING SURE YOU WERE COMING. WE BOTH KNOW HOW YOU LIE." Nancy shows her frustration.

At Shane's graduation party, Shane dances wildly with Kat. Gretchen angrily approaches Andy and exclaims "Either you control your woman, or I will!" Andy accepts her ultimatum, and goes to Kat as Gretchen goes to Shane. Gretchen, still angry, asks Shane whether he is her boyfriend or not. Kat explains to Andy that she is ready for her drive, and bribes him to come with cactus cooler. Andy refuses to go. Kat is not happy. Just then, she spots Abumchuck. She turns to Andy and pleads with him to go with her. Andy stubbornly resists her demand. Kat then tells Andy "Fine, Fuck you, give me your van keys." After a short discussion, Andy obliges, and gives the van keys to Kat. Kat kisses Andy goodbye and takes off. At the party, Doug walks up to Dean who yells out "Wife fucker!" Dean reciprocates by yelling out "Career wrecker!" Dean then punches Doug in the neck. Doug is surprised. Dean tells Doug that he is "freakishly tall" and that is the reason Dean punched his neck. Doug responds by stating that he is "freakishly long" and provokes Dean to consider how he had sex with Celia. The two then erupt into a small fight in which they both roll around on the floor trying to slap one another. The fight ends when Doug pins Dean to the floor and begins teasing him by attempting to spit in his mouth. Silas appears and talks with Shane. He wants to talk with Nancy, but Shane explains that he does not know where she is. Silas leaves, but not before Celia sees him and begins to yell. She is still angry at him for stealing the "Drug-free" signs et al. Gretchen speaks with Andy and states that she has broken up with Shane. Andy consoles her. She then explains that Shane left with Kat. Andy panics and runs off.

At the grow house, Nancy finds the entire operation disassembled. While in the kitchen, she hears the door open, and becomes scared. She reaches for a pair of scissors, only to see that it is Conrad. They then discuss Peter, and Nancy admits that she is intimidated by him. She then tells Conrad that he is a good kisser. Nancy shoes Conrad the gun Celia left at her house, and explains that she brought it in case it would be needed. Conrad tells her not to use the gun and hides it in the microwave. Peter enters, and takes the gun from the microwave. He sarcastically states that it isn't safe to put metal in the microwave, and then checks to see if the gun is loaded. Nancy sarcastically relies by saying "Hi honey, I got your note. Sure know how to charm a girl." Peter then accuses Nancy of having sex with Conrad. Conrad denies the accusation, and Peter declares it his loss because "she fucks like a wild animal." Then Sanjay walks interrupts only to find himself at the end of Peter's gun. Nobody had heard him coming into the house. Peter and Sanjay speak briefly before U-turn arrives. Peter leaves to wait in his truck. U-turn aggressively beats on the front door yelling "Yo, mother fuckers! Anybody home?" and "The big, bad wolf is here. What the fuck little piggies?" Sanjay hides in the closet.

Andy and Abumchuck drive down the interstate in search of Kat and Shane. Shane wants to go to Pittsburgh, but Kat explains that she needs to go to Paraguay first.

Peter is waiting and watching outside, but has no idea what is going on within the grow house. A pretty young lady knocks on his truck window and asks him to roll it down. He can't hear her clearly, and rolls down the window to clarify what she is asking him. She quickly reaches into the truck, unlocks the doors, and begins to walk off as two Armenian men enter the vehicle on either side. Peter reaches for his gun, but not quickly enough. Each man has a pistol, and one exclaims "Kashishian says 'goodbye.'" They drive into the garage of another house with Peter in the center seat of the truck, and close the garage door. As the door is closing, the same dog that ate Andy's toes, runs into the garage. It is evident that the dog attacks Peter.

Nancy opens the door to an obnoxious U-turn with his friend Marvin. U-turn begins to order Nancy and Conrad around and becomes violent before pulling out two semi-automatic weapons. Nancy surprisingly asks U-turn where the money is. U-turn yells that there is no money, and then instructs her to open the safe, and give him all of her marijuana. Conrad asks U-turn why he is doing this. U-turn replies that "Business is Business." and explains that Nancy and Conrad have no army. At that moment, three Armenians walk in with weapons of their own. The Armenians point their guns at U-turn and Marvin before asking for their money. They explain that they were told they would be paid to kill "Agent Asshole". Nancy can't believe that Peter is dead. Conrad is shocked, but explains to the Armenians that they would have money to give them had U-turn not tried to hold them up. The Armenians then compromise by demanding the marijuana instead. U-turn objects. They then point their guns at U-turn and Marvin. Both the Armenians and U-turn demand that the safe be opened. Nancy nervously opens the safe with all guns pointed at her and Conrad. They open the safe to find nothing but a "Drug-Free Zone" sign inside. Nancy and Conrad don't know what to do. U-turn and the Armenians become very angry. Nancy reaches for her cellphone and calls Silas. Silas is amused that she is calling and demands that she allow him into the business. Silas looks down into the trunk of his car where there is a pile of bagged marijuana. He looks up to see a Sheriff's squad car drive up in front of his parked car. Silas hurriedly throws a blanket over the marijuana as Celia exits the passenger side of the vehicle and points at him. "That's him!" she yells. "That's the little fucker that stoled my cameras. Arrest him!" she yells again. The officer approaches as Silas hangs up the phone. Nancy looks up at the gunmen with a look of utter remorse.

[edit] Trivia

• Nancy has a sister, Jill Price-Gray.
• Sitting in her hotel room, Celia drinks bottles of Stolichnaya Cranberi vodka. There are atleast 2 bottles of the vodka in this scene.
• Dean and Isabelle eat their cereal from Fiestaware square bowls.
• Shane's graduation speech: "Greetings Agrestic Elementary School Class of 2006. Hello Teachers, parents, step-parents, siblings, boyfriends and girlfriends of parents, assorted relatives, friends of your mom and dad that you call aunt and uncle but really aren't, and Principle Dodge. As I stand before you today on the brink of junior high, this is what I have to say: You have failed us all. Everything is not OK. We have become alienated, desensitized, angry, and frightened. If we picture Agrestic as an airplane, a grand soring jet carrying us all through the sky, I think you all need to understand, 'There are mother fucking snakes on the mother fucking plane'... We are not safe, you moved here so tyhat you feel safe, but your children are not safe... I'm not done."
• Ironically, The words "NO SMOKING" are seen on the exterior of the front door to the grow house.
• Abumchuk, the Eskimo bounty hunter drives a white and brown Ford F-150 king cab from the early 1990's.
• Peter is seen in a Silver 2006 Chevrolet Silverado 1500 single cab.
• U-turn uses two Uzi submachine guns against Nancy and Conrad.
• The Armenians use two pistols and an MP5 Submachine gun.
• Music played in this episode includes "Where Do We Go" by Tracy Speuhler, and "One Thousand Tears Of A Tarantula" by Dengue Fever

[edit] Guest Stars

• Tonye Patano as Heylia
• Fatso Fasano as Marvin
• Allie Grant as Isabelle
• Indigo (actress) as Vaneeta
• Page Kennedy as U-turn
• Maulik Pancholy as Sanjay
• Eden Sher as Gretchen
• Renee Victor as Lupita
• Andy Milder as Dean Hodes
• Special guest star Zooey Deschanel as Kat
• Special guest star Martin Donovan as Peter