User:Numbuh3.14/Quotable Quotes in Codename: Kids Next Door Fanfics
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There are a number of notable lines spoken by characters, many of them villains, in Codename: Kids Next Door Fanfics by Numbuh3.14. Following is a comprehensive list of quotes from Numbuh3.14 Fanfics, as well as from a few of Numbuh3.14's versions of actual episodes, arranged by speaker.
[edit] Episodic Villains
[edit] Anna Worthington
From "Operation: S.O.C.I.E.T.Y."
- (Jimmy, Anna, Larry, and Sarah are in KND Arctic Prison; Sarah and Anna argue)
Anna: This is all your fault, Miss Delightfulization!
Sarah Lifeworth: Well, you let a freak like that Jimmy send students to school on a snow day!
King Larry: Hey, girls, girls, calm down. Fighting won't get us out of here.
Jimmy: (sitting on the prison bed) Hey, let them argue. This is classic. (holding out a bag of popcorn) Want popcorn?
From "Operation: NEGA-PORTAL"
- (Jimmy and Anna are locked up in KND Arctic Prison)
Jimmy: How are we going to get out? I mean, we're trapped in this rotten cell and there are no doughnuts for, like, miles!
Anna: Relax, I thought of everything. (shows Jimmy the B.L.A.S.T.E.R.) Got this from a pile of defective weapons from over there.
(fires at the wall and destroys it)
Jimmy: I love you.
Anna: I know.
[edit] Annoyingly Cute Triplets Who Lived Upon the Hill
From "Operation: C.A.K.E.D.-T.E.N."
- (The Delightfuls are jolted out of their misery by the ACTWLUTH)
Delightful Children from Down the Lane: And who might you be?
ACTWLUTH: (in a slow, hissing unison monotone) Why, we're the ACTWLUTH! You heard about the greatest cake ever, didn't you?
Delightfuls: So, what about it?
ACTWLUTH: Oh, you'll see. (They each smile a hideous smile)
- (The ACTWLUTH show the DCFDTL the drill machine they built)
ACTWLUTH: We named this machine the Earth Digger. It is our most prized possession . . . . besides our Mother's cake recipe, that is.
Delighhtfuls: How do you activate this thing? We want to eliminate those pesky Kids Next Door.
ACTWLUTH: We'll show you, but you must promise not to tell our grandson, er, Father, that we're here.
Delightfuls: We promise. Now show us how to work the Earth Digger!!
[edit] Chester
From "Operation: S.A.F.A.R.I."
- (Numbuh 1 ends up on a remote island while investigating claims of kids being turned into moose)
Numbuh 1: Very peculiar.
(He is hit in the arm by a flying syringe; Dr. Phineas Sharp emerges from a bush)
Dr. Sharp: Oh, oh! I am very, very sorry! I thought you were an animal.
Numbuh 1: And you are?
Dr. Sharp: Doctor Phineas Sharp, animalogist at your service.
Numbuh 1: (shaking her hand) You study animals?
Dr. Sharp: (snapping) Well, I don't sure don't study abominable snowsuits!
(Numbuh 1, remembering a recent encounter with an "Abominable Snowsuit", chuckles weakly)
Dr. Sharp: So, you want to see my lab. (Numbuh 1 nods) Cool!
(As Dr. Sharp heads off, Numbuh 1 follows)
Numbuh 1: I don't trust her. I mean, come on, "animalogist" isn't even a real word!
- (Later, Numbuh 1 is wandering the woods, noting that he now has moose hair on his arms and antlers on his head as a result of the needle)
Numbuh One: I've got to get off this island!
(Another needle flies at him, but Numbuh 1 ducks and this one hits a tree instead)
Numbuh One: Ha! (he leaps in the bushes and drags out Dr. Sharp)
Dr. Sharp: Uh, Numbuh 1, I don't know what came over me. I thought you were an animal again.
Numbuh One: Oh, I'm an animal all right. And it's all thanks to you, Dr. Phineas Sharp. (lays his newly-acquired antlers on Sharp's neck) Or should I say, Chester?
Chester: (taking down the Phineas Sharp disguise) It's too late to stop me, Nigel Moose-o. Half of this island's children population are already moose-ified and the rest who aren't will soon become a source for my Moose-sicle operation.
Numbuh One: (slowly becoming a moose; he backs away) That's the lowest you've ever gone, Chester.
Chester: (during Numbuh One's transformation) Well, are you going to face me like a kid, or an animal?
Numbuh One: (his voice rather gruff) An animal!!!
(He charges Chester, head bowed and antlers pointed in Chester's direction; the former camp counselor/fast food worker/mad scientist screams in high-pitched terror, using his Phineas Sharp voice)
[edit] Delightful Children from Down the Lane
From "Mission: Virtually Impossible"
- (The KND have arrived at the Desert Delightfuls Tower)
Numbuh One: I'll go up and deactivate the tower.
Hologram Delightfuls: (heard but not seen) Uh, uh, uh. Only Numbuhs Three or Five can deactivate the tower.
Numbuh Four: Whaddya mean, you dorks? You saying that only a girl can deactivate the towers?
Hologram Delightfuls: (snickers) So you're not so dumb as you look.
- (The LTDFCD appear while the Delightfuls are berating the KND)
Hologram Delightfuls: Who are you? You look like us!
Little Traitor Dudes for Children's Defense: Yeah, we guess we do. We're the Little Traitor Dudes for Children's Defense, if ya don't mind, dudes.
Hologram DCFDTL: Dudes? Who do these Traitors think they are?
[edit] Destructively Nefarious Kids
From the Operation: NEGA-PORTAL Video Game
- (After being defeated, Mr. Boss' Super-Dome Bot explodes, sending him and all the other villain bosses, including Negative Numbuh 4, flying far, far away)
Numbuh 3: (sitting up) Where am I? What happened?
Negative Numbuh 3: You were hypnotized by the adults, but we defeated them.
Negative Numbuh 1: (yelling after the villains) And don't EVER come back!
Eizzil: (laying a hand on her ex-boyfriend's shoulder) Forget about them, Negative 1.
Negative Numbuh 1: I guess you're right. (angrily) But they ever show their faces around here again, we'll beat the heck out of them all over again! I swear it!
Numbuh 4: (aside, to Negative Numbuh 86) Hey, at least you guys get to swear. The worst I get to say is "crud".
Negative Numbuh 86: (whispering back) Blame the censors, that's all I can say.
[edit] Heinrich von Marzipan
From "Operation: L.I.C.O.R.I.C.E."
- (Heinrich is in his Arctic Prison cell when the wall comes crashing down; he sees a ship made entirely of brown licorice parked right outside)
Heinrich: Well, there's something you don't see . . . . every . . . . day?
(He gulps as two pirates made of licorice approach him and put their licorice swords to his neck)
Black John Licorice: Arrr, Heinrich, we meet again.
Heinrich: Um, yeah, no clue who you are.
(The pirates pin him against the wall)
Black John: Nice one, laddie, but ye ain't gettin' out of this one. Ye've got a licorice seed that we want, and we're gonna get it, even if we gotta slice ye open.
Heinrich: Look, about that, it was all a big misunderstanding. I thought it was candy, you know, because it was. I'm sure there are plenty of other seeds out there.
Black John: No, me matey. We want the candy seed. Boys?
(The pirates close in on Heinrich, blacking out the screen)
[edit] Jerry Rassic
From "Operation: V.I.C.T.O.R.Y."
- (Numbuh Four charges with Numbuh Three; she is attacked by a pair of Soda Control Cops while he runs into Jerry)
Jerry: Well, well, if it isn't my old friend, Wally Beat-All-My-Bullies! Well, not this time!
(He summons a Vandalociraptor, a graffiti-spraying Velociraptor-type bully)
Numbuh Four: Your holograms don't scare me, Jerry!
Jerry: (slyly) Oh, I never said they were holograms, did I?
(Numbuh Four screams as the Vandalociraptor lunges at him)
Jerry: (laughing) This is better than the Discovery Channel!
From "Kids Next Door B.A.T.T.L.E." Video Game Story Mode
- (Numbuh 4 faces down Jerry alone on Bully Island)
Numbuh 2: (from above) Hey, Numbuh 4! Need some help?
(Numbuh Four looks up to see Numbuh Two in the C.O.O.L.B.U.S.)
Numbuh 4: Sure, buddy!
(The C.O.O.L.B.U.S. swoops down to pick up Numbuh 4)
Jerry: I don't think so! (he switches the dials on his Bully Projector to fire a blast that grounds the C.O.O.L.B.U.S.)
Jerry: What'cha gonna do now, suckuhs?
Numbuh Four: How about beat the crud out of you?
Numbuh Two: Works for me!
(The two high-five, signalling a partnership; the battle then begins)
[edit] Nurse Claiborne
From "Operation: P.I.N.K.-E.Y.E."
- (Numbuh 2 has discovered the "secret" to Nurse Claiborne's Specialty Apple Crumbles)
Numbuh Two: Man, that is so disgusting!
Nurse Claiborne: Yes, isn't it? Gross tendencies run in the family, you know. (A water balloon bursts on her back)
Joe: (lying in bed) Does a short attention span run in the family, too?
Claiborne: Forget your eye crust! I'll just pinkeye you to death! (She raises a balloon)
Numbuh 2: Ain't gonna happen, sister. My teammates will be here, and it'll be all over.
Claiborne: Well, it's all over for Nurse Claiborne! (She throws the balloon she was going to use on Joe at herself; she falls to the floor, covered in eye crust)
Numbuh 2: Is that it?
Joe: (coming over) I don't think so. That's not Claiborne. That's just a shell. (He collapses, still weak from the pinkeye; Numbuh 2 catches him, and then looks out the window)
Numbuh 2: She's still out there, somewhere. But I'm sure my teammates know some good trackers who can find her.
From "Operation: H.O.M.E."
- Numbuhs 3 and 5 come across the lady attendant for the Rainbow Monkey retirement home using a machine to grind up Rainbow Monkeys)
Numbuh 5: Ms. Buena, what are you doing?
"Ms. Buena": Just what I intended to do- turn Rainbow Monkey into delicious Rainbow Munchies cereal. It makes it crunchier, don'cha know?
Numbuh 3: Hey, that's not nice!
Numbuh 5: Wait, Numbuh 3. Using innocent creatures to further her own gains. Where does that sound familiar?
Numbuhs 3 and 5: (together) Nurse Claiborne!
Claiborne: Well, this plan is bust. Gotta fly! (she ditches the attendant costume and bolts for the door)
Numbuh Three: Hey, Lady, catch this! (She throws a Big Bottom Rainbow Monkey at Claiborne; the doll's incredible fatness knocks the evil nurse to the floor) Numbuh 5, get her!
Numbuh Five: My pleasure! (She leaps at the nurse, and the two fist-fight)
Claiborne: You can't win! I was trained in seventeen types of hand-to-hand wrestling, ten of which I made up myself!
Numbuh 5: Numbuh 5 wasn't tryin' to beat'cha, just lure ya! (She looks up, Claiborne does to the same)
(Numbuh 3 pulls a rope, causing a net to fall down on top of Nurse Claiborne while Numbuh 5 rolls to the side to get away)
Claiborne: Well, this stinks!
[edit] President Jimmy McGarfield
From "Operation: S.O.C.I.E.T.Y."
- Numbuh 2: (to Larry) So, when do we get inducted in the Honor Society?
Larry: Oh, I don't do that.
(The chair next to Larry turns, revealing President Jimmy)
Jimmy: I do!
Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 5: (in unison) President Jimmy?!!
Jimmy: The one and only.
Anna: (stepping out from behind the chair) Don't forget me, Anna Worthington, President's secretary.
Jimmy: Oh, be quiet.
From "Operation: H.E.R.O.E.S."
- (King Larry is about to touch the Super Computer Device)
Delightful Children: No, keep your hands off that.
Larry: Why? I'm the Head of the Honor Society. I can do what I want.
Jimmy: (with Anna and Sarah behind him) Because, you dolt, that is a sorta, you know, huge complicated computer . . . . thingy.
Father: It is what we use to scan for our enemies' locations.
Mr. Boss: It's highly fragile.
Jimmy: Uh, yeah, what they said.
[edit] Senator Safely
From "Operation: S.A.F.E.T.Y."
- (At City Hall, Seymour Safely is showing off a robot to the Mayor)
Mayor: So what exactly does this "thing" do, Safely?
Safely: This is a Safety Bot, specifically designed to make anyplace on Earth 100 percent safe. It automatically neutralizes anyone doing anything that it deems unsafe.
Mayor: How can it tell?
Safely: (tapping the traffic cones on the Bot's shoulders) It uses these to sense whenever someone says the word "unsafe", and it automatically neutralizes whatever the person saying the word deemed unsafe.
(The two men head back into the Mayor's Office)
Safely: Should help me with my campaign for senator, eh? So, Mr. Mayor, what would you say to purchasing one of these babies?
(As they leave, the Safety-bot's eyes open and glow red)
- (Senator Safely is attacked by his Safety-bot during one of his campaign speeches, as well as the audience attending the speech)
Senator Safely: Wait, what are you doing? I didn't say the command word.
Master Safety-bot: You no longer command me, Safely.
Safely: Stop! STOP!
Master Safety-bot: (picking up Safely and strapping him, via a large seatbelt, to the wall) Deactivation word, inactive.
Safely: (slaps his forehead) Drat! I knew I forgot something!
[edit] Teen Ninjas
From "Operation: F.O.U.R.T.E.E.N."
- ("Eizzil" enters the Teen Ninja base where Cree and Chad are waiting)
Cree: So?
Chad: Did you get it?
"Eizzil": (innocently) Get what?
Cree: You know exactly what. The information about Numbuh 14, you pathetic little wimp.
("Eizzil" transforms into Marin (Numbuh 12 after her betrayal in Op. SLUMBER))
Marin: Of course I got the information. And those Sector V jerks don't suspect a thing.
Father: (appearing on a screen on the nearby wall) Very good, Marin. You did well on your first mission. Now, I want all three of you to go together for your next mission- capture Numbuh 14 and bring him to me.
Cree and Chad: (simultaneously) I have to work with him/her.
Father: (flames up) DO IT! Or there'll be two less Teen Ninjas to clean up after around here.
[edit] Valerie the Were-Poodle
From "Operation: H.O.U.N.D."
- (Valerie is working on her homework when Numbuh Five barges in with Numbuhs Two and Four)
Numbuh 5: Valerie, where's the dog who ate my homework?
Valerie: (coolly, not looking up) Oh, you're still fuming about that?
Numbuh 5: (gritting her teeth) Where is it, Val?! I don't want to play games with you.
Valerie: (turning to them) Oh, well you see, I don't own the dog who ate your homework.
(Numbuh 2 visibly sighs)
Valerie: (turning into a Were-Hound, in a growling voice) I AM the dog who ate your homework! 'Cause there is only one thing Were-Hounds like better than good homework -- the human who did it!
- (Numbuhs 2, 4, and 5 leave after Mrs. Thompson catches Valerie)
Mrs. Thompson: How could you reveal our little secret? I told you to keep that big mouth of yours shut!
Valerie: I'm sorry, M-M-Mrs. Thompson.
Mrs. Thompson: (calmly) It's okay. (she starts to turn into a Were-Hound herself) It'll all be over very soon.
Valerie: (also turning into a Were-Hound) Oh yes, yes it will!
(The Were-Hounds snarl at the audience as the screen goes black and the "End Transmission" appears)
[edit] Fanfic Exclusive Villains
[edit] Coach Jules Kitor
From "Operation: O.L.Y.M.P.I.C.S."
- Kitor: Well, well, if it isn't the Cheaters Next Door?
Numbuh Four: Hey, slimeball, we didn't cheat!
Numbuh One: But we know who did.
Kitor: Well, it couldn't possibly be me, because I'm a perfect law-abiding citizen.
Numbuh Two: (whispering to Numbuh One) Are you sure nobody took him and replaced him with a robot?
[edit] Farry Fanbrite
From Operation: THE END IS NEAR Video Game
- (After a short cutscene showing Farry taking out Numbuh 65.3)
Farry: No Kid Next Door is a match for me! I was made in the image of the best operative ever! I can beat anyone!
Numbuh 4: (stepping out of the KND S.C.A.M.P.E.R.) Can you beat . . . . me?!
Farry: Well, I was hoping for Numbuh 86, but I guess you'll do! Bring it on, shorty!
Numbuh 4: (leaping at Farry) Don't call me shorty!
[edit] Lillian Green
From "Operation: WHEN GIRLS ATTACK"
- (Numbuh 3.14 knocks Numbuh 60 off his feet)
Numbuh 60: Hey, what'd you do that for? I thought you were a KND operative.
Numbuh 3.14: (giggling) You kids are so gullible.
(She transforms back into Lillian Green; Numbuh 60 gasps)
Lillian: Now, where was I? Oh yes, I was about to create a monster powerful enough to destroy all the Kids Next Door, female and male alike.
Numbuh 60: You can't do that! (A blast hits him and turns him into a girl; pan to Ms. Margaret, holding a Girlifying Rifle pointed straight at him)
Margaret: Who's to say what we girls do and don't do? Certainly not you boys!
Soccer Mom: You children should know better!
[edit] Michael Newman
From "Operation: DOUBLE-TROUBLE"
- (Numbuh 362 apologizes officially to Sector V after learning that the Teen Ninjas attacked the foreign operatives)
Numbuh 65.3: Numbuh One, we just found out that Mr. Boss is planning an attack on an nearby ice cream parlor. He intends to replace the owners with two of the Ice Cream Men, so that they can raise prices so high only adults can afford the ice cream!
Numbuh One: We're on it. Kids Next Door, Battle Stations! (the team leaves)
Numbuh 362: It's been a long day. I need a siesta. How 'bout you, Numbuh 86?
Numbuh 86: Naw, I'm fine. (Numbuh 362 leaves) You enjoy yourself . . . . (she transforms into Michael, wearing a B.R.A.)
Michael: . . . . while you can! (He laughs aloud maliciously, but stops abruptly when the Numbuh 44 twins walk past) Darn interruptions!
[edit] Episodic Allies
[edit] Captain James "Jimmy" P. Dirt
From "Operation: D.U.C.K.Y."
- (The crew of the S.S. Stinkypants lassos Moby Duck around the neck)
- Crew Member 1: Captain Dirt, we have 'im!
- Moby Duck: (projecting in a female voice) You fools! I have not come this far to be denied! I will see you clean or else drag you down to Davy Jones's Locker!
- Captain Jimmy: Oh, and what authority do you have to do that, eh?
- Moby Duck: What authority? Captain James P. Dirt, I . . . . (the head of Moby Duck opens to reveal a lady piloting) am your mother! (she wrenches the lasso out of the crew's hands and uses it to capture Jimmy, whom Tommy immediately runs to save)
- Tommy: Jimmy, no!
- Captain Jimmy: (sadly) No, she's right, Tommy. If I must take a bath, then so be it.
- Mrs. Dirt: Good boy! You'll get extra TV time for saying that.
- Tommy: But your last name is "Dirt"!
- Mrs. Dirt: (snapping) Hey, he's trying to be reasonable here! Let him be!
[edit] Elfa Strike
From "Operation: N.A.U.G.H.T.Y."
- (The KND, in the COOLBUS, return to the site of their treehouse and Numbuh 1's house, where the elves calling themselves "Elfa Strike" are waiting, although the treehouse is missing)
Numbuh 2: Hey, who are you guys?
Numbuh 1: And where is our treehouse?
Wintergreen: Battle first, ask questions later! Elfa Strike, attack! (he leaps into the air) Wintergreen!
(Coniferous leaps into the air and lands, creating a shock wave)
Coniferous: Coniferous!
Nutcracker: (teleporting here and there, making Numbuh 3 dizzy) Nutcracker!
(The last elf, Snow Angel, flutters in the air and creates a flurry of snowflakes)
Snow Angel: Snow Angel!
Numbuh 4: "Elfa Strike"? What kind of dumb name is that? Ahhh . . . .! (he screams as he is besieged by Nutcracker, appearing out of thin air above him, and landing on top of him)
- (After Edna Jucation introduces the members of the Faculty Four)
Edna: Well, kiddies, whatcha gonna do now?
Numbuh 1: Kids Next Door, Battle Stations!
Wintergreen: (running with the rest of Elfa Strike up to the KND) No, let us deal with these weirdoes. You stop those Delightfuls!
DCFDTL: As if!
Numbuh 3: (leaping at the DCFDTL) How dare you ruin my Christmas!!
[edit] Joe Balooka
From "Operation: S.O.C.I.E.T.Y."
- (Jimmy, Larry, Anna, and Sarah are being led away by Numbuh 86 and the Numbuh 44s while Joe and the Sector V Team watch on the sidelines)
Jimmy: (yelling) You'll never get that dumb kid back! I brainwashed him into giving me his job!
(He is pushed onboard the S.P.R.A.Y.S.H.I.P.)
Joe: Well, looks like we'll have to get ourselves a new Fourth Grade President . . . . again. (to the Sector V team) We could use your help.
Numbuh Two: (jostling him playfully) Naw. It's your job.
[edit] Wilson Woodrow
From "Operation: E.L.E.C.T.I.O.N.S."
- (Wilson is telling Numbuh 1 the story of how the Delightfuls betrayed Wilson)
Wilson: It was some time before the elections began. I was in my office (well, Ex-President Jimmy's office, but that's not the point) when the Delightfuls came in.
Delightfuls: (in flashback) We know you're busy with election preparations and the like, but we wondered if you could make us the winners.
Wilson: You can imagine my shock. The very idea of cheating was unheard of in Gallagher elections. However, the Delightfuls knew their stuff. They said,
Delightfuls: (in flashback) If you make us the winners, we'll give a slice of our latest cake that Father is baking for us.
Wilson: I accepted, but I know I shouldn't have. Right after the elections, after they dragged you to Permanent Detention, they had me sent here too. It was claimed that I tied li'l Muffy Jenkins' shoelaces, causing her to trip.
Numbuh 1: Isn't that just like those Delightful Dorks?
Wilson: Indeed. But we've got to stop the Delightfuls, or who knows what other mischief they'll cause.
