Love Fist

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The 1986 line-up of Love Fist (from left to right): Willy, Percy, lead singer Jezz Torrent, and Dick. Willy is unusually absent in-game during Grand Theft Auto: Vice City, despite being mentioned there.
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The 1986 line-up of Love Fist (from left to right): Willy, Percy, lead singer Jezz Torrent, and Dick. Willy is unusually absent in-game during Grand Theft Auto: Vice City, despite being mentioned there.

Love Fist is a fictional hair metal band that exists in the Grand Theft Auto series. Their first and most important appearance was in Grand Theft Auto: Vice City, where they play a pivotal role in the storyline of the game.

Their inclusion in the game could quite easily be considered a tribute to Spinal Tap, another famous spoof rock band of the 1980s. Given the sexually explicit and crude nature of the band, the name "love fist" is likely a reference to the sexual act of fisting.

Contents

[edit] Band history

Love Fist hails from Scotland. No other details are given regarding the band's origins.

[edit] 1986

As of 1986, the year in which Vice City is set, Love Fist is managed by Kent Paul. The band's line-up is:

The names Percy, Dick and Willy are slang words for penis, while Jezz is a slightly altered spelling of jizz, which is slang for semen.

All four members have abusive life-styles, and constantly need alcohol, drugs and sex. They are referred to as bisexuals, though they have only ever been seen wanting sex from women; the "bisexual" statement may have been meant as an insult. They do not get along well together, as each member considers himself more important then the others in the band. Most notably, Jezz Torrent gives an interview on KCHAT where he declares that he is Love Fist.

At this point, they are quite famous, and have released a number of albums. They are considered "the monsters of rock'n roll excess". Their songs feature wacky, absurd, and mostly dirty lyrics. For example, the lyrics to the chorus of "Fist Fury" are:

Love Fist fury, we're all gettin' pussy
With our love rockets shootin' around
The girls are goin' crazy as we are getting laid
Shootin' Love Fist goo all around

The band also has a mascot, called Love Beast.

A minor historical in-joke is Dick's soccer jersey, which appears to be based on those of the Argentina national soccer team. The team emerged as the champion of 1986 FIFA World Cup, and also defeated the English soccer team during the quarter-finals, suggestively pleasing Dick, a Scotsman.

[edit] 1992

As of 1992, the year in which San Andreas is set, Love Fist has all but disappeared. However, their break-up might be recent, as some signs of them still remain. A poster of the band can be seen during a cut-scene, and DJ Tommy "The Nightmare" Smith mentions the band in passing when he asks "Hey, whatever happened to Love Fist?" Finally, Jezz Torrent himself can be heard in an advertisement for the Epsilon Cult, crediting the cult for helping him get over his drug problems.

[edit] 1998

As of 1998, the year in which Liberty City Stories is set, one of the former members of Love Fist has a successful solo career, and is now known as Crow. He is promoting his show Crowfest, a Live Aid/Live 8-type show whose name parodes Ozzfest.

It is unknown which former member of Love Fist Crow is. He could be a member of the 1986 line-up of Love Fist who has since changed his name, an older member of the band who quit before 1986, or a newer member who joined after 1986. The only clue is that Crow claims to have joined a religious cult after leaving Love Fist - something Jezz Torrent also did.

While there is little indication of Love Fist's fate at this point, a billboard in game suggested that the band was to play live at the Four Dragons Casino in Las Venturas "this Winter." At the top of the billboard, the slogan reads "The Band You Thought Were Dead Is Live Again!" - which is similar to real life hair metal band Mötley Crüe's 2005 reunion slogan "The Band You Thought You'd Never See Live Again!" Coincidently, Mötley Crüe were featured on V-Rock in Grand Theft Auto: Vice City, alongside Love Fist.

[edit] The music

[edit] Songs

The stage of the Steel Heart Stone Cold Prostate Tour.
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The stage of the Steel Heart Stone Cold Prostate Tour.

A number of songs from Love Fist are named in the game, notably during a radio interview of Jezz Torrent on KCHAT and in a commercial of Love Fist's tour on V-Rock. The titles are:

  • "Beast Fist"
  • "Bury Me Deep Inside"
  • "Chin Stainer"
  • "Dangerous Bastard"
  • "Dangerous Man, Dead Family"
  • "Down, Down, Down"
  • "Dragon Eyes"
  • "Fallen Stars On Shattered Dreams In The Rain"
  • "Fist Fury"
  • "Fist Till Morning"
  • "Four Boys Against Your Face"
  • "Liver Buster"
  • "Satan's Pillows"
  • "Stone Cold Prostate"
  • "Take It On The Chin"
  • "The Four Scottish Horsemen Of The Apocalypse"
  • "Zinc Deficiency"

Of all the songs, only "Dangerous Bastard" and "Fist Fury" can be heard on V-Rock.

[edit] Albums

Some of Love Fist's albums are mentioned during the interview on KCHAT. They are:

[edit] Tour

In 1986, Love Fist is on a world tour "that has been banned throughout the world", called the Steel Heart Stone Cold Prostate Tour. Vice City is the only stop of this tour mentioned on the radio commercial. During the game, Tommy Vercetti has to help organize the group's appearance in Vice City, by providing the band members with drugs and prostitutes, protecting them from a deranged stalker, hiring a biker gang to work as security for the show (a reference to The Rolling Stones' show at Altamont Speedway, where the Hells Angels were hired as security, with disastrous results) and driving them to their show in their bomb-rigged limo (a reference to the movie Speed). After the completion of these missions, Tommy is backstage with the band at the show, and one band member reveals they don't actually play during the show – they use a recording of their performance and lip sync.

[edit] Credits

The Love Fist limo has "LUV F1ST" vanity plates
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The Love Fist limo has "LUV F1ST" vanity plates

In reality, the songs were done by the following people:

Musicians:

  • Andy Thomson
  • Mark Farquhar
  • Neil Mchaffie
  • Trevor McDonald
  • Paul Mackie

Writers:

  • Allan Walker
  • Paul Mackie
  • Trevor McDonald
  • Dr. Boogie
  • Craig Conner

The speaking voices of the characters were done by:

  • Kevin McKidd (Jezz Torrent)
  • Russell Foreman (Percy)
  • Peter McKay (Dick)
  • Mark Hanlon (Willy)

In Liberty City Stories:

  • Gregg Martin (Crow)

[edit] See also

In other languages