Krikkit Wars
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| Krikkit Wars | |||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
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| Combatants | |||||||||||
| Galactic Imperial Government | Krikkit, White Robots | ||||||||||
| Strength | |||||||||||
| Unknown | Several thousand warships, battleclubs, various grenades | ||||||||||
| Casualties | |||||||||||
| Two grillion | Unknown1 | ||||||||||
| 1Possibly no real organisms from Krikkit involved in actual combat | |||||||||||
The Krikkit Wars were a fictional war in the universe of Douglas Adams' The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, as featured in the novel Life, the Universe and Everything.
The war was started by the people of planet Krikkit. For a long time their world had been entirely surrounded by a dust cloud made up of the pulverized parts of the computer Hactar. Because of this, they had been unable to see any other stars and had believed themselves to be alone in the universe.
Hactar wished to atone for an earlier incident in which it had been tasked with designing a weapon capable of destroying the universe for the Silastic Armorfiends, a violent and warlike race, and had developed a "Supernova Bomb" that would use a hyperspace junction to link every star in the universe and make them all go supernova simultaneously. However, it deliberately incorporated a design flaw, resulting in his being pulverized by the Silastic Armorfiends. It later realized that it was not its place to make such decisions and nurtured the Krikkiters to arrive at the same state of mind as the Armorfiends by building a spaceship, crashing it onto their planet, and subconsciously aiding them in repairing it. When the first Krikkit space pilots exited the dust cloud and discovered the entire universe, they decided it would have to go.
In a very short time, xenophobia overwhelmed the Krikkiters and, again unknowingly assisted by Hactar, they designed a massive fleet of battle cruisers and a huge army of deadly white robots declared war on the rest of the galaxy they inhabited. Although galactic casualties numbered about two grillion, the entire Krikkit race was eventually captured (except for one battle cruiser which was missing, presumed destroyed) and put on trial. They were sentenced by Judiciary Pag L.I.V.R (Learned, Impartial, and Very Relaxed), also known as Zipo Bibrok 5x108, to have their planet sealed in a Slo-Time envelope, within which time would progress almost infinitely slowly, and remain there until the end of the universe, at which point it would theoretically emerge and be the sole inhabitant of the universe. The lock would be found on a comet orbeting the planet just outside the envelope, while the key would be the Wikkit Gate.
