Ham Radio (Frasier)

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Ham Radio is an episode of the fourth season of Frasier, which actor Kelsey Grammar has identified as his favourite. Frasier decides to re-create a radio mystery, Nightmare Inn for KACL's anniversary.

He hires a voice actor to play several minor parts, but finds faults with each of his renditions - his Austrian accent sounded German, and his dwarf too tall, for example. The actor storms out, leaving Niles to step in (without the benefit of rehearsal).

Gil is handed the role of a butler called Nigel Fairservice, who we are told was forced out of the army under mysterious circumstances (Roz remarks that his playing of the character will make it seem less mysterious, a reference to Gil's perceived homosexuality). His favourite line of dialogue (a monologue as he dies, reminiscing about "my boyhood in Surrey, romping with my schoolchums in the fens and spinneys, where the twilight bathed the hedgerows like a lumbant flame") is cut from the show after rehearsals, but Gil is determined to get it in. After being cut off the first time, he introduces an otherwise-unheard-of brother, Cedric, who begins to say the same things before he, like Nigel, is 'shot.' After Frasier informs the audience that there are no more Fairservice men alive, Gil tries to bring in an ice cream man (after Noel plays an incorrect sound effect) who claims to be a friend of Nigel's to deliver the same speech, but he is also shot. At this point Daphne, who is listening to the live broadcast at home, says "this is turning into a bloodbath".

Additional problems include Bulldog having a severe case of stage fright, Niles being given six different roles (with six completely different accents) unrehearsed, Bulldog's dyslexic girlfriend struggling to learn her sole line ("look out! He's got a nug!"), and Roz's emergency dental work (as of showtime, the novocaine hadn't worn off, leaving her dialogue unintelligible). A disastrous performance is the inevitable result.