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[edit] WikiLand vs. Doomsday349

• Case File

[edit] First Appearance

Bailiff: The court will please come to order. The Honourable Judge Editor at Large presiding. First appearance, WikiLand vs. DoomsDay349.

Clerk: People in the court all rise!

Judge: Thank you. Please be seated. Will those present please identify themselves?

Crown: Her Majesty Editor at Large, Your Honour. Prosecution.

DoomsDay349: His Dark Eminence, DoomsDay349. Defense.

Clerk: The prosecution and the defense have now been identified. Let the First Appearance of defendant DoomsDay349, Case "WikiLand vs. DoomsDay349", #916564789213942134651198687651651654, proceed.

Clerk: May I remind all in the courtroom that we must must abide by all local laws, as well as more important laws.

Bailiff: (ahem!) That's my job to say that

DoomsDay349: May we proceed?

Bailiff: Sir, please remain calm, or I will have to remove you to a holding cell. Her Honor Editor at Large had to take a short break to the bathroom.

DoomsDay349: I am quite calm. Merely impatient. My trial has been delayed for quite some time you know.

Clerk: Indeed it has.

Bailiff: I'm walking into chambers to see what's taking Her Honor so long.

Crown: Gentlemen, Her Honor is present and reviewing case notes. Patience please.

Judge: Mr. Doomsday, please wait for the judge to speak. Thank you. I have attempted to reply and have been caught up in no less than FOUR edit conflicts! Patience on behalf of all present is requested.

Will the defendant please state if he has retained a lawyer or has requested legal aid?

DoomsDay349: I will be representing myself. People are not to be trusted.

Judge: Thank you. The defendant may choose to request a Preliminary Inquiry or to proceed directly to trial. Please take time to review your decision, Mr. DoomsDay. You may take time to research the matter or request advice of myself if you wish, given the lack of other legal experts.

DoomsDay349: I shall request a Prelimary Inquiry, thank you.

Judge: Let the Court Clerk record that the defendant has requested a Preliminary Inquiry and is acting as his own defence. Will the Clerk please make his way to my chambers to record appropriate dates and then proceed to set a Preliminary Inquiry date with the defendant. Court adjourned.

Her Honour rises and makes her way to her chambers

(You may now rise and talk)

DoomsDay349:...that's it for tonight? Or will we be continuing later?

Bailiff: The Defendant is asked to contact the court clerk to set a date for the Preliminary Inquiry. Everybody else still in the courtroom is now asked to vacate. Security is asked to close all entrances to the room and to request the Maintenance Department to start cleaning up.