Downton F.C.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Downton F.C. is a football club based in Downton, near Salisbury, Wiltshire, England. They were established in 1905 and joined the Wessex League in 1993. They have reached the 1st round of the FA Vase twice in their history. For the 2006-07 season, they are members of the Wessex League Premier Division they are owned by chairman Chris Pearce. They are managed by Sam Softey.
There he is look, Exactly player !!!!
Breaking News
Sam Softey has come under severe stick in recent months for his frequent visits to his local tanning branch Tantastic. The orange skinned middle aged Wessex League manager dubbed to be the new face of Tango is referred to by his Downton players as Sunbed. The soft drink franchise Tango (drink) are in talks over a lucrative 5 million pound deal with the club. The Downton moto will be hearby changed to "You've been Tango'ed". There recent signing of Peter Crouch has had the fans flocking in at Wick Lane.
A consortium being led by Rob Scott, former coach of Downton, are looking to take over the club and a bid within the end of the year looks highly likely. Downton look to have a bright future with the promising Jack Newman on the books. He has really excelled this year and looks to be getting better and better with every match he graces. He instantly become a fans favourite after the switch from the ranks of high flyers Salisbury City who top the conference south . It surely cant be long before this young talent gets the first team call up.
Jack Newman is named the Segio Ramos of Downton football club and is already pushing for a first team slot, however, it is his constant willy watching in the changing rooms and drug fuelled gay romps which some are saying is holding him back. Jack is being constantly linked with having an affair with TV's gay funny man Graham Norton. Who goes ? you decide !
Downton are on the way to signing hotshot Matty Holmes but nothing has been put to paper yet but sam softy said hes a great tanner and will be a good asset to the squad. This could mean an up roar for the by-pass boys AND TREV..............Natty !
Celebrity tanner David Dickinson has broken his silence today over his rivalry with Downton F.C manager Sam Softey. The 65 year old British antiques dealer from stockport is fuming with Softeys recent imergence into the limelight. Dickinson claimed the TV world is not big enough for two orange people. This is not only an ego thing but a serious health and safety concern. Last month Gary 35 a resident from Durley in Kent complained David Dickinsons tan was so bright during bargain hunt that his eye balls nearly fell out. Two tanners on televisions across the country will only increase the risk of eye ball loss for thousands of innocent viewers. The Downton manager was asked by Dickinson to tone down. But this may lead to an up roar at wick lane, and a celebrity death match could be on the cards this christmas.
| Wessex League Premier Division 2006/07 | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
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AFC Totton | Alton Town | Bemerton Heath Harlequins | Bournemouth | Brading Town | Brockenhurst | Christchurch | Cowes Sports | Downton | Fareham Town | Gosport Borough | Hamble ASSC | Hamworthy United | Horndean | Lymington Town | Moneyfields | Poole Town | Ringwood Town | VT F.C. | Wimborne Town edit |
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