B1FF
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- This article is about the Usenet pseudonym. For the type of internet slang, see B1ff. For the Unix mail notification program, see biff.
B1FF or BIFF was the most famous pseudonym and the prototypical newbie on Usenet.
Articles from BIFF were characterised by all uppercase letters sprinkled liberally with bangs, typos, "cute" misspellings, use (and often misuse) of fragments of chat abbreviations, a long signature block, sometimes even a doubled sig (signature), and unbounded naïveté.
A sentence describing BIFF is
- EVRY BUDY LUVS GOOD OLD BIFF CUZ HE'S A K00L DOOD AN HE RITES REEL AWESUM THINGZ IN CAPITULL LETTRS LIKE THIS!!!11
BIFF posts articles using his elder brother's Commodore VIC-20. BIFF's location is a mystery, as his articles appear to come from a variety of sites. However, BITNET seems to be the most frequent origin. The theory that BIFF is a denizen of BITNET is supported by BIFF's (unfortunately invalid) electronic mail address: <BIFF@BIT.NET>.
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[edit] Origin
Later information indicates that BIFF was originally created by Joe Talmadge, also the author of the infamous and much-plagiarised "Flamer's Bible". The BIFF filter he wrote was later passed to Richard Sexton, who posted BIFFisms much more widely. Versions have since been posted for the amusement of the net at large.
[edit] An example B1ffism
This was posted on the Usenet Oracle mailing list digest 775-06:
The Usenet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was: > Oh great oracle, > > what do you do with a supplicant who leaves his .sig at > the end of his questions? > -- > -- And in response, thus spake the Oracle: } WHAT R U TALK1N' ABOUT MAN? SIGZ ROOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! } } LATER MAN. } } BIFF. } } -- } BBBBBBBBBBBBB IIIIIIIII FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF } BBBBBBBBBBBBBB IIIIIIIII FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF } BBB BBB III FFF FFF } BBB BBB III FFF FFF } BBB BBB III FFF FFF } BBBBBBBBBBBBB III FFFFFFFFF FFFFFFFFF } BBBBBBBBBBBBBB III FFFFFFFFF FFFFFFFFF } BBB BBB III FFF FFF } BBB BBB III FFF FFF } BBB BBB III FFF FFF } BBBBBBBBBBBBB IIIIIIIII FFF FFF } BIFF@BIT.NET BBBBBBBBBBBB IIIIIIIII FFF FFF BIFF@PSUVM.PSU.EDU } BIFF@BIFFVM.BIT.NET BIFF+@ANDREW.CMU.EDU } B1FF@AOL.COM B1FF@DELPHI.COM B1FF@PRODIGY.COM B1FF@COMU$ERVE.COM } B1FF@NETCOM.COM B1FF@WORLD.STD.COM B1FF@MCS.COM } B1FF@B1FFNET.FIDONET.ORG B1FF@WELL.SF.CA.US } B1FF@ATHENA.MIT.EDU B1FF@CYBER.SELL.COM } BIFF@MSN.COM } } MY SIG /^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^\ WAITING } CAN BEAT !@@@@@@NUKULAR@@@@@@@@! 4 } UP YOUR ------------------------- ARMAGEDIN } SIG !@@@@@@@@BIFF@@@@@@@@@! IT"LL B } !!! \--------! !--------/ AWESOME!!!! } ! ! } --------- THIS SPACE 4 RENT CALL BIFF } /\\\ ! ! HA HA FOOLED YOU!!! } ||| / \ } /-\ } /----/-\------------------------------------------------------------\ } | BIFF|@|AOL.DELPHI.PRODIGY.COMPU$ERVE.NETCOM.WORLD.MSN.B1FF.EDU DUDE!> } \----\-/------------------------------------------------------------/ } \-/ } |-| BANG THE FALSE METAL HEAD THAT DUZZN"T DRINK BEER!!! } \/// HOT METAL TUBS RULE IN A MAJOR WAY DUDEZ!!! } } __________ __________ ___________ ___________ __ } / /\ / /| / /| / /| / / } / / \ / // / // / // / /| } ********** / **********/ ***********/ ***********/ ** | } ** |____** / ** ** |______ ** |______ ** | } ** / ** ** ** / /| ** / /| ** | } **/ **/ \ ** ** / // ** / // ** | } **********/ / ** *********/ *********/ ** / } ** |____** // __**______ ** | ** | **/ } ** / **/ / ** /| ** | ** | / /| } **/ **/ / ** // ** / ** / ** / } **********/ **********/ **/ **/ **/ } } BIFF@BIT.NET BIFF@PSUVM.PSU.EDU BIFF@BIFFVM.BIT.NET BIFF+@ANDREW.CMU.EDU } B1FF@AOL.COM B1FF@DELPHI.COM B1FF@PRODIGY.COM B1FF@COMU$ERVE.COM } B1FF@NETCOM.COM B1FF@WORLD.STD.COM B1FF@MCS.COM } B1FF@B1FFNET.FIDONET.ORG B1FF@WELL.SF.CA.US } B1FF@ATHENA.MIT.EDU B1FF@CYBER.SELL.COM } BIFF@MSN.COM } } K0M1NG S00N T0 THEATREZ NEER U!!!!!! } _______ _______*_______ _______ _______ _______ _______ __ __ } +. /____ //______//______//______/ /______/ /____ / /______//_/ /_/ } ` _____/ / __ _____ . _____ , __ _____/ / ______ ____ } , / ___ _/. / / . / ___/ '/ ___/ +. / / / _ __/ / ___/ / / } / /__/ | __/ /__ / / . , / / , . / / / / \ \ / /___ / /\ \ } /______/ /______//_/ * + /_/ *, ` ,/_/ /_/ \_\ /______//_/ \_\ } } FEETUR1NG THE GRATE B1FF1NSK1 AS C4PTA1N B1FF!!!!!! } } B1FF 4RUOND TH4 W3RLD!!!!! } . } _--_|\ } P3RTH--> / \<--SIND3Y } \_.--._/ } v<---B1FFSM4NIA!!!!!!! } } ___ (_) } _/XXX\ } /XXXXXX\_ <-- MT. B1FF1NGT0N __ } __ __ /X XXXX XX\ MT. K1BO (SHORT3R _ /XX\__ ___ } \__/ \_/__ \ \ TH4N B1FF'Z) ----> _/X\__ /XX XXX\____/XXX\ } \ ___ \/ \_ \ \ __ _/ \_/ _/ - __ - } __/ \__/ \ \__ \\__ / \_// _ _ \ \ __ / \____ } __ \ / \ \_ _//_\___ _/ // \___/ \/ __/ } /_______\________\__\_/________\_ _/_____/_____________/_______\____/___ } /|\ } / | \ _____ ____ } / | \ \ V / } THE RO4D T0 B1FFN3SS!!!! / | \ | R00T | } / | \ | 666 | +---------+ } ALL MUST TR4V3L 1T / | \ \___ ___/ | B1FF | } / | \ V | R00LZ!! | } SUMD4Y!!!!!!!! / | \ | o +---------+ } / | \ | o } / | \ | |\__/| .~ ~. } / | \ | /o=o'`./ .' } / | | {o__, \ { } / | / . . ) \ } / | `-` '-' \ } } | .( _( )_.' } | '---.~_ _ _|