B1FF

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This article is about the Usenet pseudonym. For the type of internet slang, see B1ff. For the Unix mail notification program, see biff.

B1FF or BIFF was the most famous pseudonym and the prototypical newbie on Usenet.

Articles from BIFF were characterised by all uppercase letters sprinkled liberally with bangs, typos, "cute" misspellings, use (and often misuse) of fragments of chat abbreviations, a long signature block, sometimes even a doubled sig (signature), and unbounded naïveté.

A sentence describing BIFF is

EVRY BUDY LUVS GOOD OLD BIFF CUZ HE'S A K00L DOOD AN HE RITES REEL AWESUM THINGZ IN CAPITULL LETTRS LIKE THIS!!!11

BIFF posts articles using his elder brother's Commodore VIC-20. BIFF's location is a mystery, as his articles appear to come from a variety of sites. However, BITNET seems to be the most frequent origin. The theory that BIFF is a denizen of BITNET is supported by BIFF's (unfortunately invalid) electronic mail address: <BIFF@BIT.NET>.

Contents

[edit] Origin

Later information indicates that BIFF was originally created by Joe Talmadge, also the author of the infamous and much-plagiarised "Flamer's Bible". The BIFF filter he wrote was later passed to Richard Sexton, who posted BIFFisms much more widely. Versions have since been posted for the amusement of the net at large.

[edit] An example B1ffism

This was posted on the Usenet Oracle mailing list digest 775-06:

The Usenet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> Oh great oracle,
>
> what do you do with a supplicant who leaves his .sig at
> the end of his questions?
> --
> --
And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} WHAT R U TALK1N' ABOUT MAN?  SIGZ ROOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
}
} LATER MAN.
}
} BIFF.
}
} --
}     BBBBBBBBBBBBB          IIIIIIIII            FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
}     BBBBBBBBBBBBBB         IIIIIIIII           FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
}      BBB        BBB           III             FFF         FFF
}       BBB        BBB          III            FFF         FFF
}        BBB        BBB         III           FFF         FFF
}         BBBBBBBBBBBBB         III          FFFFFFFFF   FFFFFFFFF
}          BBBBBBBBBBBBBB       III         FFFFFFFFF   FFFFFFFFF
}           BBB        BBB      III        FFF         FFF
}            BBB        BBB     III       FFF         FFF
}             BBB        BBB    III      FFF         FFF
}              BBBBBBBBBBBBB IIIIIIIII  FFF         FFF
} BIFF@BIT.NET  BBBBBBBBBBBB IIIIIIIII FFF         FFF  BIFF@PSUVM.PSU.EDU
} BIFF@BIFFVM.BIT.NET                                 BIFF+@ANDREW.CMU.EDU
}   B1FF@AOL.COM  B1FF@DELPHI.COM  B1FF@PRODIGY.COM  B1FF@COMU$ERVE.COM
}          B1FF@NETCOM.COM  B1FF@WORLD.STD.COM  B1FF@MCS.COM
}            B1FF@B1FFNET.FIDONET.ORG  B1FF@WELL.SF.CA.US
}              B1FF@ATHENA.MIT.EDU  B1FF@CYBER.SELL.COM
}                             BIFF@MSN.COM
}
}   MY SIG         /^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^\          WAITING
}  CAN BEAT        !@@@@@@NUKULAR@@@@@@@@!                 4
}   UP YOUR       -------------------------            ARMAGEDIN
}    SIG           !@@@@@@@@BIFF@@@@@@@@@!          IT"LL B
}    !!!           \--------!   !--------/            AWESOME!!!!
}                           !   !
}                         ---------         THIS SPACE 4 RENT CALL BIFF
}      /\\\                 !   !               HA HA FOOLED YOU!!!
}       |||                /     \
}       /-\
}  /----/-\------------------------------------------------------------\
} | BIFF|@|AOL.DELPHI.PRODIGY.COMPU$ERVE.NETCOM.WORLD.MSN.B1FF.EDU DUDE!>
}  \----\-/------------------------------------------------------------/
}       \-/
}       |-|     BANG THE FALSE METAL HEAD THAT DUZZN"T DRINK BEER!!!
}      \///          HOT METAL TUBS RULE IN A MAJOR WAY DUDEZ!!!
}
}   __________      __________       ___________     ___________        __
}  /         /\    /         /|     /          /|   /          /|      / /
} /         /  \  /         //     /          //   /          //      / /|
} **********   /  **********/      ***********/    ***********/       ** |
} **  |____** /       **           **  |______     **  |______        ** |
} ** /      **        **           **  /     /|    **  /     /|       ** |
} **/      **/ \      **           ** /     //     ** /     //        ** |
} **********/  /      **           *********/      *********/         ** /
} **  |____** //    __**______     **  |           **  |              **/
} ** /      **/    /  **     /|    **  |           **  |              / /|
} **/      **/    /   **    //     ** /            ** /               ** /
} **********/     **********/      **/             **/                **/
}
} BIFF@BIT.NET BIFF@PSUVM.PSU.EDU BIFF@BIFFVM.BIT.NET BIFF+@ANDREW.CMU.EDU
}   B1FF@AOL.COM  B1FF@DELPHI.COM  B1FF@PRODIGY.COM  B1FF@COMU$ERVE.COM
}          B1FF@NETCOM.COM  B1FF@WORLD.STD.COM  B1FF@MCS.COM
}            B1FF@B1FFNET.FIDONET.ORG  B1FF@WELL.SF.CA.US
}              B1FF@ATHENA.MIT.EDU  B1FF@CYBER.SELL.COM
}                           BIFF@MSN.COM
}
}                     K0M1NG S00N T0 THEATREZ NEER U!!!!!!
}      _______ _______*_______ _______   _______  _______   _______ __  __
}  +. /____  //______//______//______/  /______/ /____  /  /______//_/ /_/
} `  _____/ /   __    _____ . _____   ,   __    _____/ /  ______  ____
} , / ___ _/.  / / . / ___/ '/ ___/  +.  / /   / _  __/  /  ___/ /   /
}  / /__/ | __/ /__ / / . , / /   ,  .  / /   / / \ \   /  /___ / /\ \
} /______/ /______//_/ * + /_/   *, ` ,/_/   /_/   \_\ /______//_/  \_\
}
}              FEETUR1NG THE GRATE B1FF1NSK1 AS C4PTA1N B1FF!!!!!!
}
}                    B1FF 4RUOND TH4 W3RLD!!!!!
}                                   .
}                               _--_|\
}                     P3RTH--> /      \<--SIND3Y
}                              \_.--._/
}                                    v<---B1FFSM4NIA!!!!!!!
}
}                ___                          (_)
}              _/XXX\
}             /XXXXXX\_ <-- MT. B1FF1NGT0N                 __
} __    __   /X XXXX XX\     MT. K1BO (SHORT3R    _       /XX\__      ___
}   \__/  \_/__       \ \    TH4N B1FF'Z) ----> _/X\__   /XX XXX\____/XXX\
} \  ___   \/  \_      \ \               __   _/      \_/  _/  -   __  -
} __/   \__/   \ \__     \\__           /  \_//  _ _ \  \     __  /  \____
}  __    \  /     \ \_   _//_\___     _/    //           \___/  \/     __/
} /_______\________\__\_/________\_ _/_____/_____________/_______\____/___
}                                    /|\
}                                   / | \       _____ ____
}                                  /  |  \      \    V   /
}     THE RO4D T0 B1FFN3SS!!!!    /   |   \      | R00T  |
}                                /    |    \     |  666  |     +---------+
}     ALL MUST TR4V3L 1T        /     |     \    \___ ___/     | B1FF    |
}                              /      |      \       V         | R00LZ!! |
}     SUMD4Y!!!!!!!!          /       |       \      |       o +---------+
}                            /        |        \     |      o
}                           /         |         \    |   |\__/|  .~    ~.
}                          /          |          \   |   /o=o'`./      .'
}                         /           |              |  {o__,   \    {
}                        /            |                   / .  . )    \
}                       /             |                   `-` '-' \    }
}                                     |                  .(   _(   )_.'
}                                     |                 '---.~_ _ _|

[edit] See also

[edit] External links